Episode 3.1 + 3.2

Laverne Cox

Art by Jason Stokes

Truly, a lady who needs no introduction. If you’ve been hiding under a rock for the last 5 years, Laverne Cox is an actress, performer, and outspoken advocate for trans issues. She is the portrait of grace and composure, somehow managing not to dock Katie Couric square in the kisser when the television host dared to ask Laverne about her private parts on national TV. As one of the most visible, openly trans celebrities ever, Laverne has used her platform to bring attention to the pressing and life-threatening issues facing trans folk in the United States.

She is an artist to the core, showing an aptitude for dance and performance at a very young age. But life wasn’t always pirouettes and sashays for Ms. Cox. Growing up trans in rural Alabama is no fucking joke, and Laverne attempted suicide in middle school as a result. Thank the gawds that this was one endeavor in which she failed. She grew up to become not only an incredible actress and trans rights advocate: she is also THA KWEEN of firsts. I won’t even name all of the “Firsts” on Ms. Cox’s CV, because there’s so many and I’m lazy. Listen to Episode 3.1 – So much YAAAAS KWEEN to learn more about Laverne’s many, many, many, MANY accomplishments, and to discover the term “Negro Goth.”

Grace O’Malley

God bless the motherfucking Irish. Grace O’Malley is now known as the Pirate Queen of Ireland. Politically and sexually active in the 16th Century, Grace O’Malley was not a woman to cross. With an army of men at her disposal, Grace raided ships, slayed the English, and fucked any and every man she could get her pirate hands on. She served as the Don Corleone of Ireland for over 5 decades, going head-to-head with the dick-slingin’ English on a regular basis.

Art by Jason Stokes

Like the coasts of Eire, Grace’s story is shrouded. Rampant alcoholism and lack of documentation have left much of her biography to myth and legend. What we do know is that in 1593, her and Queen Elizabeth had some intense queen-on-queen action. Grace (boated? shipped? swam?) to England to meet with the queen after one of Liz’s henchman showed up in Ireland and started acting a damn fool. In pure Irish fashion, Grace did not bow to Liz in her own court. Liz’s noblewomen reputedly gasped and clutched their pearls at this insolence.

We cannot be sure what the details of their conversation were because Liz invited Grace to discuss the terms of their agreement in private. What we do know for sure is that Elizabeth reneged on virtually every item of their accord, because she was English. In response, Grace continued to thwart and murder the English at every opportunity. What a lovely fucking story.

Grace O’Malley has become a beloved personification of Ireland and is the focus of Episode 3.2 – Ds and Dead Sailors. Listen to the episode to learn about some of the most ribald and raunchy O’Malley legends and to hear about the first time CJ ever got high on Ecstasy.

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